Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Ugly Nipple Blog #1

Phil: Dude man, Josh, there are some ugly ass nipples in this world. People need to know about this man!
Josh: yeah
Phil: Dude man, Josh, I think we should post pictures of some of the worst nipples we have found on the interweb.
Josh: weeerrrd
Bob: Damn I love boobies but these next ones suck!
Josh: and now to a picture

Dude, you know those weird goldfish with the weird brain that are all puffy and sticking out of their heads and shit....yeah well that's what these nipples look like.
Josh: nah, it looks like shes grown boobs on her boobs
Bob: those boobs are poppin!
Phil: their like chameleon eye boobies!
Bob: seriously now, last night I was watching porn and these boobs came up, and I really had to stop jacking off.
Josh: lets move on to the next nipples
Phil: bun you this running dialogue isn't witty enough we need more nipple humor
Bob: I like these titoreenees they make my mouth drool...
Josh: moving on..

dude whats with these next nipples?
Josh: I like to call this variety, "the witches nose"
also I would like to add how these nipples resemble weird moles.
Bob: I don't know about these nipples, they don't seem real to me, they look like a bag of crushed cookies, a piece of shit.
Phil: I kind of think the boob to the far left resembles a rodents nose of some kind.
Josh: yeah like a dogs nose or something
Bob: looks like your mom...
Phil: I really want to make a joke about these nipples and Anne frank but that would probably be anti semetic.
Josh: I'm not getting the analogy..
Phil: me either but I just keep thinking Anne frank when I look at these.
Josh: so not only is Anne frank blind, deaf and dumb but she has ugly nipples?
Phil: dude your thinking Helen keller, but than again maybe so am I
Bob: I have a boner
Phil: Next nipples....

God damn!
Josh: those are so gross
Phil: I like how her nipple folds, she has a nipple crease.
Josh: they look like their deflated, or losing air, kind of looks like pudding.
Bob: I don't like boobs anymore...
Phil: maybe her nipples have swine flu?
Josh: she was probably pulling on her nipples too much or perhaps they were once puffy but now she cut out the puff or something.
Bob: maybe they've been over milked
Phil: I find that comment sexist and offensive
Josh: dude this whole thing is sexist
Phil: god dam josh I knew you'd say it...
Josh: I wonder if her nipples make flappy noises when she runs. Or if she gets nipple cheese!
Phil: lol nipple cheese...
Bob: next nipples...

dude those are old lady boobs!
Phil: I know my boobs and I agree!
Bob: How low can you go
Josh: her boobs have stretch marks
Phil: this isn't about the boobs its about the nipples
Bob: personally I have a thing for stretched boobs
Josh: they look like failed utters, those nipples look so long dude they look like cow nipples
Phil: yum beef and nipples, often a tasty combo not in this case however.
Bob: I concur
Josh: dude their sooo gross. Just look at how much they fold over her chest! They look like they got stuck in the vacuum
Phil: once again its about the nipples!
Josh: next nipples than...

dude these look like some next ancient amazon nipples
Phil: dude they look like burnt pancakes!
Josh: ancient amazon pancake nipples
Bob: those are some gross nipples, but seriously what color is that?
Josh: you know those hammer things that soften meat? It looks like she got hit by that, or run over by a car or something
Phil: I see the tire tracks
Bob: next nipples

Now this next nipple should have a label on it saying, warning: Choking hazard for children under four
Bob: Is that a tiny baby, or a gigantic nipple?
Phil: ah, the miracle of life
Josh: Looks like the baby is scared shitless
Bob: I wonder how much milk would come out of that bad boy?
Josh: Probably the equivalent of a fire hose
Phil: Would sucking that nipple technically be gay?
Josh: Why?
Phil: It looks like this guys penis...


Josh: Oh God!
Phil: Micro Penis...
Bob: Mines still smaller I win!